buying a house. I was fairytaling my way around. Is fairytaling a word and if it is, did I spell it right?
Anyhow, last night i went to put an offer on a townhouse. Come to find out, at 9:30 when I finally got home... that a previous offer had already been accepted. (no one could have told me that before I made the trip to Montclair AFTER a long ass day of work to go sign 10 pieces of paper, write a check and sit and gossip with an old man that never shuts up). Seriously, I'm not disappointed that the townhouse isn't available. I'm pissed I wasted my entire evening.
I took it as a sign. I've looked high and low and the only thing in my price range are foreclosures. They are all nasty, disgusting, filthy, feet prints on the wall, hanging off a cliff pieces of shit. Unless I have 5,000 dollars.. I'm going ot have to live in a shit hole. Dreams only are reality when the reality involves a husband and a wife, or a single person who is good with money or has filthy rich parents. I'm neither. I suck with money, I'm tired and i just want to go shopping and be immature.
I have no interest in new carpet, new paint, a beautiful yard for me to mow. I'm burnt out and I'm tired of sitting with a real estate agent, I'm tired of worrying about money. Shit, I'm tired of being an adult.
I've been more stressed the past 2 weeks than I think I've ever been in my life. I got a new position at my job, well.. more responsibilities without extra pay. WTF.
Also, here is my other area of concern. Should I be concerned, I don't know. Dave and I have been dating for almost a year 1/2. I love him.. I would marry him if he asked me today. We've been keeping up with our Long Distance relationship for 6 months. He refuses to move back to Fredericksburg. He loves his career and he is really starting to like Lynchburg. That area is a different pace. Slower, calmer and it is sure as hell not DC. He and I have been "sort of" discussing stuff. Like, what will happen to our relationship and what not. i told him if he got me a ring and wanted to seriously get married, I would move to Lynchburg. I'm not that desperately in love with my career. i'd give it up for love and a family at the drop of a dime. Granted, I feel as if I'm setting myself up for failure. Maybe opening up too much because I'm really worried about being dumped. (it happened once, it can happen again right).. but I have to be open to this. I don't know what he wants because he's not a man of words. He says.. "Lynchburg has houses for 100,000". He is secretly nudging me.
I'm so confused. For now.. I'm going to find a house to rent and go buy me some new clothes. That's what I'm going to do.
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4 comments:
:(
Go shopping, gurl. That's what I do, and it works every time--and I don't care whether or not it's a mature thing to do or not!
I don't think you should give up yet. You have plenty of time to find a house. I also don't think you should move to Lynchburg.
Don't give up! Everything will work out the way it is supposed to!
SM
Go shopping it does make you feel better!
Go shopping and eat tons of crisy salty fatties!
Cindy, what is Crisy? is that like a mix between greasy and crispy?
Shannon - you have a husband and a child and you have everything your heart desires. You know how alone you felt when MJ was gone for a year.. that is how I feel everyday. Especially when all of my friends have someone.
and your right.. I think I'm going to go shopping
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